Blog 13
My name is Wylie and I'm your PainPAL!
Welcome back, and thanks for your support!
Change-Up (an expected or unexpected change in life)
Wow, October beckons! I can't believe it.
Last year in mid October my Gall Bladder burst ... talk about a Change-Up!
But that situation taught me so much. First, not to try to be a hero when I'm feeling sick ... I had been sick for a whole week before the Gall Bladder burst, but didn't go to the doctor. Second, I learned just how fragile my body is, and how much more attention I need to pay to what I eat PLUS how much exercise, and what routines and 'ruts' I've fallen into.
That's what this Blog is all about: Change Up and out of the routines and 'ruts'
We all have routines and ruts, it's part of being human. But making a change to our habits and routines is often so, so difficult ... especially if you're like me, and deal with pain everyday (because we have to overcome Pain too!). For years I let the disability and Chronic Pain boss me around (because it was too difficult to overcome) ... and sometimes I didn't even realize it.
With the initial injury and disability, as time went on, from months to years, from surgery to Physical Therapy to surgery to PT, I began to let the chronic pain and disability write my life story, instead of keeping my self-confidence and Faith reinforcing my determination to get healthy.
But that's changed recently!
Perhaps in response to the Gall Bladder emergency, at the beginning of 2018, I began trying (with a lot of prayer too!) to 're-calibrate' myself to the idea: 'I'd like to get Healthy'!
First, I accepted that I wasn't sure what I was facing, and so I decided to visit five different surgeons for second opinions to try to get a better picture of what's wrong ... instead of just accepting what one doctor said, and trusting them get it right (a path which backfired with the failed implants from 2011 & 2012). Instead, as my psychologist said, it's time to be the quarterback of my health.
Hearing what the five different surgeons thought of my situation helped me decide for myself that I needed to start physical therapy exercises if I was going to start to 'get Healthy'. So I saw a Physical Therapist and began physical therapy with regular sets of non-weight bearing exercises. And for a month and a half or so, began to see progress with my leg strength ...
Then ... I experienced an unexpected CHANGE-UP !
It began with an outdoor cat showing up with seven kittens!! and my feeling compelled to act ... because last year I didn't when I saw a mom cat with her four kittens, and well ... I can do math ;)
Thankfully and luckily, I found a professional who does TNR (trap, neuter, release) and we were able to trap the mom cat and her seven kittens. We returned the mom, and found homes for the kittens through an adoption non-profit group. However, once that mom and the kittens had left the area, another mom with her litter of four showed up (see picture), plus another mom cat with her single kitten.
I don't know what came over me, but that whim of a decision (talk about Change Up in life) has made a significant (and Positive) impact on my life, quality of life and activities of daily living too.
Perhaps the increased activity and feeling stronger due to the PT exercises, made me think I could do it ... perhaps it was the empathetic thought to help the kittens (and not wanting to see them have to live outside), entered into my decision making ...
But there was this challenge too: the kittens were a little older and hence on the edge of not being able to be socialized, and I was told it was more likely I'd have to put them all back outside if I was unable to work with them.
Still I did decide to foster and it's been a rewarding experience, and an interesting Change Up for me, as I've gone FROM >> lonely, depressed and isolated feelings, the fear of doing much because of pain, the 'atrophy' of my leg muscles causing more pain due to instability of the knee ...
'Pain' was in charge of my life
to NOW >> doing daily chores and exercises, trying to prepare for surgery,
the intention of 'Getting Healthy' is now in charge of my life!
It's a new day. And I have a new Determination.
With Faith that I'm going to Get Better, and be Healthy.
These are Mindsets I haven't had because my condition consistently got the better of me time and again, because I allowed Pain and Fear to dominate and hold power over me, dictating what I could and could not do.
Instead, there's been a Change Up of my day to day living:
accepting instead of denying ... keeping an open-mind instead of a closed one ...
trying new things, listening to others, asking for help, instead of the self-sabotaging my health (so-to-speak ... though I was often unaware) by giving into pain and fear.
Now I must stay Vigilant and keep working to Get Healthy!
Yes, everyday I have to feed the cats, clean their litter boxes, do the dishes, vacuum often, and get their food from the store too, plus play with them when I have any energy left! But while these are daily chores that I haven't had to do for a long time, it's an important next step in the process to GETTING HEALTHY, and reclaiming the living and activity I once did without second thought.
For sure I'm happier than I was, and so far I've been successful in integrating the new chores into my daily routines, even with the chronic pain and disability. It's funny, but seeing these cats everyday, keeps me inspired to keep pushing myself into new routines instead of giving up and giving into the pain or the fear of having more pain.
It seems odd but true, that by serving these cats, I'm actually serving myself!!
Then again, it's that old story of not knowing what one can achieve until trying!
I suppose that's why I love the saying, Dream BIG, and Dare to Fail !!
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Thanks again for reading and THANKS for your Encouragement!
Till next time ...
my name is Wylie, and I'm your PainPAL!
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